what happened yesterday...
the fourth year batch is building houses for the less fortunate people as an outreach activity and my class's turn was yesterday. we were all excited but to our surprise there was nothing on the empty lot but dugged up holes, it was still in the foundation stage, so there was alot of work to be done. we started what the previous class left, digging up the foundation, it lacked a depth of one foot...and the lot was fairly large. "oh well..." i thought to myself, "might as well start working.." so i started digging along with my other classmates. when i looked around at the progress of what we have done, i got kind of irritated at some of my classmates running away/hiding from the manual labor plus the weather didnt help us at all. It was really hot! Luckily, my classmate, Mike, lent me his cap. But after all the work when i took off the cap, the cap got really dirty and it was wet too (from my sweat, ok!?), i told Mike i'll have it washed first before returning it to him since it was embarrassing to return the cap being as it was. after the "manly work", my class went to mcdonald's for lunch!! we even had a guided tour around the small vicinity! I am now disillusioned from the magic of mcdonald's! LOL. i started coughing really hard on the way back to school. well after sweating really hard then straight into an aircon room...anybody could get sick by that!
well silly me...i didnt pay any attention to it. as a matter a fact, i even went out to the mall and met up with my friend, Trish (after we did the outreach activity we went back to school and just waited to be dismissed). Its been a really long time since I last saw Trish..oh btw, for the people who dont know...Trish is a graduate of CSA, so yea, she's a a year older than me (in terms of schooling)...but actually we're just the same age (we even have the same month of bday, Jan..but she's a few days earlier than me). Trish was a new student of CSA last year and I met her in my club, FOME...after that we just started hanging out. she's really cool!! well now, she's in college (DLSU) taking up physics, though she said she might shift. anyways, we watched a movie (Proof), really good even if its about math (i thought i was gonna get a hemmorage! luckily nothing happened. :P ) then after that we just walked around and catched up on stuff...we even went to timezone...we saw the prizes for the tickets and one of the prizes was a pressure cooker worth 800 tickets!! and we were like, i want that!!! LOL. for 100php worth of game load we were determined to get that pressure cooker!! i swear!! that was so funny!! obviously we didnt get it...but it was fun!!
earlier today, when i first woke up...i coughed like crazy!!! it felt like my throat was being wrapped with barbed wires (like in the commercial!)...plus every part of my body aches!!! i guess it was from all that "manly work" i did yesterday from the outreach. im just lucky i dont have a fever...i cant afford one right now...especially with graduation soo near..i still have a lot of requirements to accomplish (and what am i doing here?!). earlier this morning before i started doing any school work i thought, "what a mess this is..(referring to my room) i can't work like this". so naturally, i started cleaning my room! took my entire morning to really clean my room. i've got new bed sheets now and new clean pillows to go with it. i can see my clean floor now and my shelves are "organized". how many times have i mentioned that i've clean my room in a month? i think in a month...i'd clean my room twice or thrice..and this cleaning...its really cleaning!! boxes everywhere, brooms, rags, etc. oh well...just goes to show how dirty i can be with my room...but i make up for it whenever i clean it. ^___^V
after that hectic morning, the rest of the afternoon was spent by me watching "Tanging Ina". i was trying to see if i can use any dialogue material in it for my filipino project. then i started doing my english paper was well...im half way done with it. and maybe tomorrow, i'll go to the doctor! my coughs been really bothering me..its really hard to drink...whether cold, luke-warm or warm water...it stings my throat!!! and im the kind of person who likes to drink alot!! so right now...im really thirsty...even with just one glass of water...i couldnt finish it...it hurts my throat..i'd take small sips from it...my body pain is slowly fading away now (i drank alaxan), thank God!
right now, im at my dinning table typing this and trying to sip some hot gree tea atleast since i couldnt sleep coz of my coughs...and a thought occured to me just now within all this silence of this house...
i've always been so sure of everything when it comes to choices concerning my future. it doesnt mater if i changed my mind through the years but the fact is that im always so confident and sure of what i want to be and my choices that go along with it.
back in grade one i wanted to be a veterinarian...i would read tons of books about animals and stuff...but after i've discovered some new things about myself...i said, "drawing's fun...i want to be an artist!"..so i would always draw everyday (even today, but its just a hobby now)..but then, i noticed that other people are sooo much better than me and i felt embarrassed coz i was so proud of myself...so i moved on and stumbled on the art of writing, this was around grade 6. back then, i was also soo sure of it (writing, i mean)...i even joined the Augustinian Mirror (the grade school newspaper org) although, i landed only as a photographer, i was content to be still in the organization, thinking it would help me later on. i even applied for the UP, Los Banos (highschool for the arts) since i was so sure of what i wanted. i wasnt planning on staying to CSA, my eyes were set on UP...i made the first cut of the applicants..but at the second round...i lost it...so i'm still stuck in CSA...well no big, i met miren, keight and the others. then when highschool came, during the time of a crisis here in the household (we lost maids, stupid maids stole from us!)...i learned to cook from my father and added the experience from the third year trade expo...i finally knew what i wanted!!
so what's the point of all of this?? i dont know...it just got me thinking...that im always so sure of my future...of what i'll become...that other people around me envy me since i know what i want and i know what i'll become after graduation...and yet, now.....im at the point of my life...when suddenly im not sure of anything...the only thing im sure about is my future career...but my future in itself...im not sure of it at all.....i may have a wonderful profession in the future...i job that i love...a work that im passionate about...but as far as careers goes...
where will i be in the future??
who will i be with??
and...will i still be in a family then?
2 comments:
who really knows what we want in life? we are of fickle minds.
true, true...its soo true!! ^___~
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