they have dropped the bomb...

aaarrrrggghhhhh........the exam was soooo hard!!!!!!!!!!! omg........i dont know if i'll pass......sheeeeet..........anyways........

i'll be going to the mall later to meet up with k8 and miren!! [yaaaay!!] gonna go shop for kamsy's gift....its kamsy's bday tomorrow and she's having a party! [double yaaaay!!!]

so i guess....this compensates for my crappy exam...[not really...but it makes me feel better..]

on other things...last wednesday my car suddenly broke down!! >___< so yesterday, my dad had the car fixed and he was the one who brought me and evie to school...i got to school like 6am...and my exam was on 8am!! so....ive got nothing to do...i went to the starbucks in katipunan for coffee and breakfast as well...

surprisingly, i was the first customer there..[doi]...well...the pretty barista took notice of my uniform and started doing small talk with me...[ahehehehe....what can i say? ;P]....so now...whenever i go to starbucks...there's always this friendly aura among the two of us...[that's why i love coffee!! ahahahahha!!] oh well....made a new friend again..ahehehehe... ^___~

well i gotta go now...take care guys!!

for "eggtaf"

hello to the stranger who suddenly IM me...im surprised other people actually read my blog aside from my friends...you've mentioned we've met before?? refresh my memory please....i'd like to talk with you some more...if you have the time...oh well....

its nice to meet someone new... ^^; the time right now is 6:03pm...and the weather is really bad...plus its my fish and seafood exam tomorrow...which i havent studied yet!!! aww man...ive procrastinated all day...[watching Honey & Clover-->>great anime btw!] so enough of this now...time to cram and study!! bwahahahahahaha!!! wish me luck!! i hope to hear soon from you "eggtaf"!!!!

since i dont know your real name...and all i have is eggtaf to go with your YM id...i'll call you eggy...ok?? ahehehehe....eggy!!! ahahahahahahaha!!! just kidding!! ^___~

weekend cook-feast

i went to Farmer's Market yesterday with my mum and dad...[and to miren, there are NO farmers in farmer's market! LOL.] just bought some ingredients for my usual weekend cook-feast!! ^___~ we bought this WHOLE huge *stretches out arms* lapu-lapu...when we got home...i cleaned, gutted and filleted the whole fish by myself with the use of my trusty knives!!! ^___^ im so proud of it!! ive never filleted anything that large before...unfortunately, out of all the excitement...i forgot to get a picture of it...*sighs* oh well...there's a next time...

also, i already did my seafood presentation yesterday evening....i got my little sister, mica, to video tape me while i cooked...all i have to do now is edit it thru my lap top...[note to self: buy adobe premier cd for editing]...i made the mango salsa, cauliflower mash and panfried-almond coated-lapu lapu with mango buerre blanc sauce...it was alright...i got the taste that i wanted right...but i couldnt get the consistency right....its always like 'soupy' texture which shouldnt be....*sighs* i have a long way to go to get this consistency thing right... >___<

anyways...for today, i made clam chowder and roasted pork loin stuffed with dried prunes.. unfortunately, i ran out of cream for the clam chowder...so the chowder still has the wine taste...[btw, for those who dont know...80% of all the things we cook in school, we use wine or any alcohol for flavor, consistency, etc....hence the faint sour flavors in the dishes.]....but im glad the main course, porkloin...was perfect!! i was afraid that it'd be a bit undone from within...but it cooked through well!!! ^___^

then after that...i went to my parish with Mayette [whom i havent seen in such a long time already!! her hair's really long!!! plus, plus....she has her own band!!!! she's sooo cool!!!! ^___^]...we havent been to our parish community for a while as well...so we just dropped by to see how everybody was doing...^__~

so that's how my weekend went....i dont have any classes on wednesday and thursday coz we have to prepare for another one those long exams that we're going to have this friday...all about fish & seafood!!! ahehehehe...wish me luck!! although on thursday...i might go to CSA with miren to watch the Cheering Competition...should be fun to see! anyone else interested in watching it...lemme me know!! kita-kita tayo!!! ^___^V

well that's all for now....till next time guys!!! take care and kick-ass always!!!

mood swings....

ive been extremely depressed lately....i dont know what's wrong...hhmmm...i should list down what's been bothering me lately...then maybe i can figure out one by one what i should do...
[obviously procrastinating...]

• my family hasnt been their usual selves lately...lots of fights here and there...
  
• some of my classmates still doesnt like me...i suppose, just because we have to work together doesnt mean we have to like each other...
• i havent seen miren and keight for a long time now....i really miss them...
• i feel like im on a solo-flight whenever i go to school....[yes, i have some people that i hang out with there...but...its not the same...i dont have anyone there that i can actually confide to..]
• i try to substitute this depression with an obsession for finding love...which is obviously stupid....i am what you call a romantic...i love the idea of "being in love"...but i think i'll never actually experienced it....im too attached to my comfort zone...
• talking about comfort zone....i need to get out of this zone more often....i need to learn new things....see new places and meet new people...its not always going to be me, miren and keight....*sighs*
• im doing everything half-assed now.....not as fully motivated and full forced as i first started school....but grades are still the same [high]...im not kidding! which just surprises me more....
• i think i just really miss talking to someone....someone that i can really talk to...someone i can tell these sort of random depressing issues of mine....

oooh....who will wallow with me in my pitt that i've dug?? or will there be someone who will help me get out of it??

[you can laugh at this whole random thoughts of mine....its alright...wont blame you for it...id laugh at it if i just happen to read it...its not like the world will end nor does it revovle around me.]

first trial....

pan-fried breaded milk fish with mango beurre blanc

we were given a hwk which is due 2 weeks from now....we need to make a fish/seafood dish with starch and veggies or sidings at HOME...so meaning...we need to document what we're cooking...either by video or pictures...plus we also need to have a nice presentation [plating] and a picture of the person who we're serving the food to....

i researched yesterday of what i wanted to make for my hwk...and decided that i'll make Pan-Fried Grouper with Mango Beurre Blanc and Mango-Avocado Salsa..the salsa would be my veggie sidings then i'll try and make a cauliflower mash...instead of the usual mash potatoes for my starch....

today, i tried making the mango beurre blanc...testing the waters...the thing that i've been having a hard time is adjusting the taste...my tongue is asian...and western taste is different...im like both tastes but i cant seem to get the western flavor right when im cooking it...when i made the sauce...i accidentally poured the cream inside the same used cup for my wines and vinegars...so in turn when i poured the cream in the sauce...the cream is already split...hence i couldnt make it all thick no matter what i tried... >____< plus i think the mangoes i used where not ripe enough...the plain beurre blanc sauce itself is already kind of sour...so with the addition of mangoes i was hoping to get sweet hint from it...unfortunately i couldnt even distinguish the flavor of the mangoes anymore!! arrrgghhh.......the trial and errors of an apprentice...

well, i couldnt throw the sauce away without actually trying it with fish...so i searched inside our refrigerator and found these milk fish cutlets...just to try the sauce and to see if its compatible with the fish...although im using grouper and not milk fish...still...both are fish!! ahahahaha!!! i breaded and pan-fried the fish...and placed it on the plate...i drizzled the sauce around it...and just added a stem of dill and halve tomato for contrast of colors...i know i still need to work on my plating....creativity, i call for you!!!! >__O

anyways, when i tried it...it was pretty good actually!! just wished the sauce was thicker and that i could have tasted the mangoes a bit more...

so tomorrow...i'll be trying to make mango beurre blanc again..except this time i'll make sure the cream has a separate cup already and that i'll puree RIPE mangoes...maybe if i used puree mangoes i'll get a smoother texture and a bit thicker than usual...hhhmmmm.....

im glad im doing this really early already...at least now i can see some variations and techniques that i still have to master....

not your regular hwk i suppose....and this the first time i'll be tackling on this kind of hwk...plus im pretty sure this wont be the last...there's going to be a lot of it!!! so...im calling all my friends out there!!! whoever's free this saturday...feel free to come by my house...food tasting!! ahehehehe.....this will be happening every weekend....i cook alot on weekends...so those who've been telling me that they're up for the job of food taster...here's your calling!!! ^___~

well....i just hope that i'll be able to get the right flavor and presentation skills by then... wish me luck guys!!!

the drawing nikki gave me...

from asian food expo to mall of asia

yesterday was a lot of fun!!!!!!! truly memorable....unfortunately forgot to bring my camera so...no pictures....damn....oh well...i'll just tell you all what happened....

we first went to the world trade center for the asian food expo....it wasnt as grand as the world food expo but it had the usual free food tasting everywhere!! so wherever we went, we got a sample of each...with a thought in mind..."will our stomachs be alright?" ^^, it didnt really matter in the end. since everything tasted great and we had a lot of fun as well. also, we bumped into Alex Craig and her mum....just a small chit-chat...then when we were already full from all the food tasting and there was nothing else left to see or eat...we decided to go to the SM: Mall of Asia..

we first went to the look out point at Mall of Asia...the one where you can see the bay and smell the salty air...it was kinda awkward when we there at first....since obviously everybody that was there were couples snuggling to each other...so in turn, we just broke off the "moment" by just laughing it off and making funny jokes.....a little bit of sea air does wonders for the body!

after that...we just went around the mall, window shopping since we had no intention at all of watching a movie or buying anything to begin with since we were both on low budgets...still it was fun exploring the huge mall and almost getting lost...[had to consult the map on one time]...then before we decided to go home we played first at timezone... ^___^ we love arcades!

when i brought her home....she introduced me to her grandfather...her mother wasnt there yet...and she showed me her room and her portfolio and some plates that she has done. she's a a really cool artist!!! luckily enough, she gave me one of her drawings... ^__~ it was sooo cute...i'll scan it someday and show it to you guys!!

so that was my...uh...err....what do you call that? Miren, keight and I were talking about this whole thing about dates....it will only be called a date if the other party is acknowledged about the idea....miren and keight are teasing me to this "unacknowledged date"...lol...still it was alot of fun...

in any case...im pretty sure i'll be seeing more of her soon...since she lent me some of her comics and CDs....hmmm....

well im pretty much full of energy now to do my powerpoint presentation for school tomorrow.....so im off to actually finish it!!!!

take care!!

things are a bit better in school now...

just found out that the people whose ages are 23 and above had a meeting yesterday after class with Chef Manoj... they discussed what has happened in class and decided that the good behavior should start from them...etcetera...that sort of talk...one of the topics they discussed was my issue...the Mommies and my other friends in the barkada explained my side already and got things sorted out now....[so much for my confrontation...but i'll be on my toes now.]

it was really cool how such a huge change happened in class today after the chaos in the kitchen from yesterday...Chef Manoj was really on fire and barking at us like a mad dog yesterday coz of the noise, the disorder and the bad service...now it was really different....everybody was quiet when working....everybody was helping each other...there was order and teamwork...i never did that whole confrontation thing already since my friends and the Mommies talked to the others on my behalf yesterday from that meeting....but it doesnt mean im not going to do anything anymore....im just more cautious with how i work now...and keeping that whole teamwork thing flowing through out the room.

and just to let loose from that whole quiet-tiring-work in the kitchen...me and my barkada [noel, pao, may and kuya ramil] went to gateway and watched "You, Me and Dupree". it was really fun and just what i needed!!

i feel sooo much better now...and im really excited about saturday already!!! ^___^

though im in high spirits today already...my body cant keep up...im tired now and pretty much exhuasted....so that's it for now....

its a big day tomorrow and another day to redeem the class in the kitchen!!!

take care guys!!!

*toot* *toot*_*toot *toot*

text messages recieved...

Nikki: Elo! Pinayagan na ko ng mum for saturday!

[that just quickly brightened my day!!! i invited her to go with me to the asian food expo at the world trade center...since i have 2 tickets and all.. ^__~]

Miren: ....You can't deal with confrontations... you HAVE to deal with this, kaya nga groupwork eh...you have to learn to assert yourself, you cant just hide in your work hoping its gonna blow over....you'll have to deal with difficult people when you're a real chef...

[i love it when Miren tells me these things....stuff i normally dont know about myself...and yet at the same time...makes me feel more scared...a little voice in my head is telling me..."time to grow up anna!"]

Kuya Ramil: I remember back in 1971 when i first saw the beef caldereta. I said i can make that too! its stewing! BINGO! Where's my bobby? Syempre naman, diba?

[LOL. only to be understood by students of ISCAHM...random famous quotes from our Chef Mike!! suppose to be read with that German accent in mind...]

Kuya Ramil: Leon! Where is Leon? I need my rondo...yes, my rondo!

[more random famous quotes from Chef Uli this time...suppose to be read with that Norwegian accent in mind...Kuya Ramil is one of my barkada in class...he's 28..i know really old already...but he's fun to hang out with!! im pretty sure he texted me these fun random quotes to cheer me up....i have a barkada in class...and we're pretty cool with each other...outside that...the other people arent so cool with me...which i know by now i should work on it and deal with it already...confrontation...an old word that i need to learn more about.]

i want to cry....but no tears are falling....

today in school....i felt like the floor was suddenly pulled from under me and i was falling down unto an endless ravine...

i was informed by one of my classmates during break time that a relatively large group in the class doesnt like me....for reasons that i act like i want to work everything on my own....

first of all...i never wanted to do everything on my own....its tiring to do a job alone...but im always in a situation where im left with no choice but to do it myself...in most cases in the kitchen whenever the Chef would ask for something my classmates would just stand idle and whisper to each other what the Chef needs and not actually get it...so in turn, i'd just get it myself...

second...its second nature for me already to act on impulse...whenever Chef Mike/Uli/Manoj/whoever demands to do something...i'd jump to it right away....

third....i always welcome whatever help may come and accept constructive criticisms seriously...im not in a culinary school to show off or whatever....im there to learn and study...and im serious about it....if somebody has a problem with me...i'd appreciate it if that somebody would tell it to my face...that way we can fix things together and work things out for the better...

being in the kitchen is no joke...aside from the hard tasks given...pressure is added every minute...plus team work is really important....working in the kitchen was never a one-man team to begin with....

after the break...we went back to the kitchen...i couldnt immediatly work smoothly as i did before...knowing the prior information given to me...i hesitated now...every movement...i wasnt sure of what was i suppose to do already....in other words, i was scared....

this is really hard on me...i dont know how to deal with this...its not like these people are as the same age as me...they are older than me...

[and yet on some thought...they could act a little less my age]

but still, fact remains...they dont like me...they're older....and yes...i am intimidated now...

i cant let this get to me....im working so hard...i dont want to waste anymore time on this anymore.....i'll just try again tomorrow and work things out....hopefully...

got pulled over by a cop...

i was driving from the mall to pick up mica in CSA...i was almost near the intersection but the light turned yellow already...so i slowed down and tried to move the car a bit to the other direction since i very well know i blocked the cars behind me who wanted to turn right. to that attempt, i ended up stopping a few meters farther than i should...pass the pedestrian line...then this traffic police guy showed up from who knows where and tapped my window to roll it down. the police said i shouldnt have done that. its consider breaking the law...something about "lane marking" i wasnt really paying attention...anyways...he was trying to scare me...first he asked where i was from then asked for my liscence...he asked if i've been to makati city hall...i said naturally no, havent been inside it but i've passed by it. then he said that the city hall doesnt really let this go so easily and he just keeps adding more stuff to make it sound like a hassle for me to get my liscence if ever he gives me a ticket. then finally he asked if that was alright with me? i said, ofcourse...i know i did something wrong so why not deal with it. the police obvioulsy got the idea i wasnt a push over and im not giving him any money [suhol]. so when the light was about to turn green again...he just gave me back my liscence and let me go...

HA!! in your face you asshole!!! sheeeesh......what a dirty system we're getting these days.... *tsk*tsk*