after my french class today, i had lunch with my french class at Gerry's Grill in Jupiter.. just a small get together with the class....bond a little...eat a lot...and did some small talk as well...
apparently, the small talk was long 50 ft. drop for me..
sir was talking about this blog of a guy and he was saying that its really funny..(www.bryanboy.com) and i started saying that i have a blog as well...although i had no intention of telling the site to them my cousin, Thessa, suprised me by saying she knows about it! and when she said it...not only referring to the blog but to the contents of it as well..it practically flipped my head when i heard her say that!!!! heck...i was sweating profusely (sp?) out of being nervous....
good or bad? i dont know yet exactly....i didnt say anything on the ride home...i couldnt....i dont know why but at some level...i felt really bad....though she did say it doesnt matter...but still...all through out that lunch and on the way home...i strangley felt naked...embarrased i suppose...i just dont know how to piece everything together now...my feelings are all mixed...maybe when im in a better mood..i'll think of something...think of what?? that i dont even know yet...
i always thought i should be ready with this confession thing....but when life suddenly got the better of me...it just sucks now...but...it kinda gave me the idea...that no matter how long i "wait" for that "moment"....life won't wait at all....which sucks even more now...
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...i dont know wat to say. close you eyes and jump? scream on the way down? hmm, if life wont wait, then take the plunge with ur head high and proud. damn those ppl who belittle us! we are who we are. so if they dont like it. they can just screw themselves. end of story.
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